tomballay

This was created by Dan – I think he did a great job documenting our ride.

November 20, 2012

It’s been about eighteen (18) months since I completed my cross-country trip. The buzz from that adventure has subsided. I have gained about fifteen (15) pounds and I am starting to get bored. I believe I need to find another challenge to motivate me. I am physically, mentally, and spiritually lacking in fitness. I am unsure if I want to commit to another killer bicycle trip, but I need something. I feel like I am jogging in place.

I promised myself that I was not going to fall into the old rhythm of life once I completed my trip. I had some early success in that regard, but I am falling into an old routine. That trip motivated and rejuvenated me. Upon my return, and for some period afterwards, I was more connected and aware of my surroundings than any period of my life. I haven’t completely lost that feeling, but it has begun to ebb.

I am not sure why I am writing this. The only people who ever read this blog were friends that tracked me during the 2011 bike trip. I suppose there is something therapeutic about posting to the world, even if no one reads it.

It is Monday, May 23, 2011. I completed this trip on Sunday, May 1. So why did it take 21 days to write a conclusion to my journey. I suppose I could have completed this entry a day or so after we finished this trip as most of the thoughts included herein have been with me for some time. But I waited because I wanted to let things settle out in my own mind. I am realizing now that nothing is changing, so it is time to bring this to a close.

The most enduring image I have of this country is how vast the expanse is. It was so open and so empty throughout our route that it made me wonder where were all the people hiding. I always knew that much of the population of America is confined to the urban centers. But until I pedaled across emptiness and wilderness it never really sunk into my mind just how desolate the country is. The resources of America seem endless and the open space is overwhelming. Perhaps if we had plotted a different route I would have another impression. As it stands, I am struck by what a small physical area most people live in as compared to the enormous emptiness and openness of the uninhabited areas.

I think Americans are just friendly people. Everywhere we went, people were willing to help us and seemed interested in our story. Americans like to talk and the people we ran across along our ride were not snooty. As a rule, they are friendly and open and they like who they are. It comes across in small ways, but you can feel it. The most interaction we had with locals was at the convenience stores. I think in many cases, convenience stores are the diners of rural America. I never really paid much attention to them before my cycle ride, but I soon began to see them as gathering centers. Of course there is gas and packaged food, but in many cases we found serviceable, warm meals. Some people have laughed at us for eating meals in convenience stores, but in actual fact we had some pretty satisfying lunches (and a dinner or two) in what many people consider Gas Stations. Locally owned restaurants may be available. If the town is large enough, fast food chains might be present. But there is always a convenience story and it is almost always populated with locals. Someone would always ask us what the heck we were doing in Nowhere, USA on our bicycles. That would illicit a ten minute discussion and often ended with somebody taking a picture. I miss the convenience stores.

I think that small town America has a quality of life that is hard to beat. I like the cities. I like the hustle and bustle of city life, the excitement, food and culture of a Chicago or New Orleans or New York. But if I had to pick a place to live, it would be someplace like Wadley, Alabama. I just loved the feel of riding through small towns like Wadley. I mentioned in my daily blogs that some of these small towns are run-down and economically depressed, but many appear economically healthy and inviting. Some of the main streets that we rode through have the appearance of Hollywood movie sets; they just seemed so idyllic. I think the quality and pace of life in small town America is simply hard to beat.

From a personal perspective, this was a spiritual journey for me. Our success, our safety, and our overall execution were all directly related to faith and prayer. I think I knew this was going to be the case before we started, but it became more and more evident to me as we progressed. I don’t know how prayer works or why it works. I am sure that some people will read this and wonder where I am coming from, perhaps doubting my conclusion. There were so many things that happened during the course of this trip that I can not simply write them off to happenstance or coincidence. So many things that worked out just right, from health to safety to weather conditions, that I just know deep in my soul were providential. It was a faith journey for me, and I hope that what I experienced can be continued in my remaining time on this planet.

I know that my faith needs to be continually pushed and challenged. I learned that I become fearful and hesitant if I am unchallenged. My partner on this ride, Dan, provided the push for me. Dan has a willpower that is second to none, and he pushes himself out of his comfort zone. I, being a very competitive person, challenged myself to keep up with Dan. Hence, I was always pushing myself out and up. I know that I must find ways to habituate this in my daily life.

I learned that nothing stays the same – the road continually changes. If you don’t have a shoulder to ride on or if the wind is coming in your face, keep your head down and keep plugging away, because it won’t last forever. In the same token, when things are going well, they don’t last forever either. So perhaps my job is to keep my head down, keep grinding away at the problems of my life, and walk forward with a faith that believes that things will always change (for the better). Focus, execute, work hard, keep the faith, and keep moving forward – things will come around for the better.

I have come to look at my life as a story. Many people believe that things are predetermined and we are simply living out a script that is written in advance of our lives by the Creator. I don’t prescribe to that belief. I think we are creating our story everyday by our thoughts, words and actions. I think that I am a co-creator in the story of my life and I have decided that I want a great story. So if I want a great story for my remaining days on this earth, it is up to me to write it and to live it. I don’t believe this is a solo venture. I believe that God walks within me, in my thoughts and dreams, and he creates with me. This is a large part of what living the faith is all about. I must trust.

I believe that I was too old and too out-of-shape to ever dream that I could accomplish this challenge. Logic should have told me that this challenge was beyond what I could effectively attain. I did it because of willpower and faith (and perhaps a bit of naivety). One way or the other, this physical and mental challenge was beyond what I should have logically assumed I was capable of.

I learned that I play to the level of competition. When I compete with C students, I do C+ work, no better. If I want to excel in life, in ventures, in challenges, I need to put myself out against other individuals that seek higher performance. I am a very competitive person and I don’t like to lose. Perhaps this comes from being the fifth of five boys, I don’t know. But I do know that when someone is alongside me, pushing me, I may not like the competition, but I perform much better. The life lesson in this, for the remaining time of my life, is to watch who I hang with and to place myself alongside individuals that will push me to excel. The alternative is to accept mediocre performance.

I think my best days are ahead of me. Don’t misunderstand me, I fully know that everyday from here on out is a blessing and I am approaching 54 years of age. We don’t live forever and I can never regain my youth. But the apprenticeship is now over. Everything that I have encountered over the past 53 years of my life prepared me for what is coming down the pike tomorrow.

I can break my life into three periods –

Period One – birth to approximate age 35. This was the time of living and working for tomorrow. Everything I did was about building for tomorrow. Tomorrow was always in the forefront. Education was a sacrifice that allowed me to have a better tomorrow. I saved money for my kids future. It was always going to be better somewhere down the road.

Period Two – 35 until about age 53. So this is it? I woke up one day and realized that I was in my physical prime and this was what I had been planning and sacrificing for. Our society is set up for this age – thirty-something to fifty. This period of our lives places us squarely in the mainstream. We are the target market for just about everything. We run things and we control a large part of society. Realizing this was a bit depressing to me because I started to wonder if tomorrow was going to be better. It was like going on a vacation and knowing that each day put me closer to the end and eventually, I would have to go back to work.

Period Three – Now until ? (actually, this is the “Age of Now”). I have accepted my mortality. I have today, and perhaps tomorrow, and who knows how long beyond that. I want to live and experience everything that i reasonably can because it is in front of me.

What I have decided to do going forward is to ride with the wind and take what the road gives me. I have made this statement to a number of my friends since my return and when they ask me for the details of what that really means, my answer falls short. I don’t know exactly how to explain it, but I think I understand the concept. I feel that I have spent the last 53 years of my life pedaling against the wind. I don’t want to do this anymore. I want to learn to accept what comes to me and use it to the best of my advantage. I want to live life more fully and I want to remind myself every moment just how fortunate I have been throughout. I thank the Lord for my blessings and the gifts of my health, family and friends. The rest is just lagniappe, as they say in New Orleans.

And that is the whole ball of wax, Honey Bunch.

We rode 107 miles today to put ourselves in position to finish our ride tomorrow. We had originally planned on finishing on Monday, but changed our mind today based on the great weather and our desire to complete this trip. We are about 90 miles away from Edisto Beach, our destination.

There are so many thoughts and emotions running through my head. Unfortunately, I am typing on my Blackberry and can’t go into detail.

Tomorrow is our final wake up and ride prep. I am looking forward to the ride.

We rode 76 miles today to Sandersville, Georgia. It was an uneventful ride. In fact, I don’t think I took a single picture. The truth is, the roads and towns are really starting to blend into each other and I am having a hard time remembering one town from the next.

We are ready for this trip to be completed. Even though we only have a few more days and approximately 185 miles until we are done, the miles go one at a time. The emotions that I feel on a daily basis are quite incredible. Yesterday, I was very excited and felt that every mile was getting us closer to the finish line. Today, every hill or every bend in the road felt like it would go on forever.

This has been a great trip and I am glad that I tackled this challenge. But at this moment, I am really looking forward to the finish line. Tomorrow should be another good day for weather and wind direction. I am going to bed.

We rode 96 miles today into Forsyth, Ga. It was a beautiful day and a very pleasant ride. The weather was mild, the roads in Georgia are excellent, the scenery was beautiful, and after two weeks, we finally had a following wind. It was the day we have been waiting for since the Texas Panhandle, the last time we had really good cycling conditions.

The one sobering part of our trip today was our ride through Barnesville, GA. A tornado touched down in Barnesville last night and we came through as the clean-up was in process. I felt guilty riding my bike through the devastation. I told Dan that you could feel a bad aura in the air; we guessed there had been fatalities. Growing up in South Louisiana, I have seen post-hurricane scenes all my life. But the magnitude of what a tornado can do shocked me. We saw what appeared to be 100-year trees completely uprooted and thrown distances from their positions. You could absolutely follow the path of the tornado. You could see one house totally devastated and another, only a couple of hundred feet away, relatively unscathed. We later learned on the local news tonight that an older couple lost their lives in their mobile home. The mobile homes don’t have a chance. I am guessing this couple did not have time to react. They probably heard the sirens and the tornado was upon them.

We also learned today that the exact area we stayed in Tuscaloosa was on the direct path of the tornado. We stayed on 15th Street and McFarland, which is now completed wrecked. One story mentioned a CV Pharmacy that was destroyed on that corner. Dan and I stopped in that Pharmacy just three nights ago and purchased supplies. It is hard to imagine what happened just two days after we left. We seemingly have been just a day or so ahead of the storms and tornadoes since we left Fort Smith Arkansas.

Georgia has some beautiful areas along Highway 18, the road that we traveled today. We saw what I would describe as country estates, some colonial or antebellum mansions and some just beautiful old homes. I have never been to Georgia other than flying through the Atlanta Airport. I am favorably impressed with the area and very thankful for the great roads in this state.

We have about 250 miles remaining on our trip. The weather is going to be great the next few days. We can smell the Atlantic Beach!